25 months later...

So I went, I came back, and here I am.

It was hard, just like I knew it would be, harder than I'd thought; But also rewarding, far more rewarding than I'd ever imagined it could be.

I realized that even though I knew I didn't know anything, I didn't know even more than I'd thought.

The greatest, most impacting lesson I learned throughout my time in Chile was how to trust. While I was out there serving and teaching and being taught, the very foundation that I'd built myself upon was tried, tested, beat upon, sawed at, etc. etc.. but then it was made firm. It was built solid, immovable, and became something far greater than myself. It's something I can stand on and it will never fail. If I continue to stand there, I can't fail.

It hurt, though. It hurt to get my perspective, understanding, hope, desire and my whole self remolded and shifted, but it felt so... beautiful, to have it become something so sure and immovable.

There is so much truth available. So much joy.

Since I couldn't document (through blogging) all of the blessings and truths I received on my mission in Chile, I'm going to document the blessings and truths I am receiving and coming to know right now. Just because I'm not in Chile anymore doesn't mean my mission is over :)

Missionary

I'm getting set apart tonight at 7.

I am so ready for this.

I don't mean ready as in prepared and I've got everything under control, but ready as in, this is the time.

I love the gospel. This is what I've been waiting for.

♫ I'll go inside someday... ♫

you like those musical notes?

thought so.

I went to the temple on Saturday with my family (minus Erin, Rick and their babies, and plus Seth). It was a beautiful experience. Everything was so clear up there. Thoughts are uninterrupted and there is knowledge to be gained on every level and topic.

I spoke on Sunday in my home ward and also in the Singles branch. The Lord blessed me and I was able to have the companionship of the Spirit as I bore my testimony. I was able to speak more freely and more directly from my heart than ever before. It felt so good.

That, plus the temple, has made me incredibly exhausted.

Seth spoke in the home ward as well. We've been friends since high school (he was baptised when we were 17) and he just returned home from serving a mission in Nicaragua. He gave a wonderful talk. I learned a lot from him. I'm grateful to have seen him for about a week before I head out; it's been good.

So, about 3.5 days and I'll be a missionary.

Crazy, huh?

I'm going there someday...

Going to the temple next Saturday.

This might be the longest 1.5 weeks of my entire life.

Zen told me it would be.

Moroni 7:48

"If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear."

I have a friend who just recently reported to the MTC. His mom documented the day’s events through pictures and I just finished going through them. Now I feel sick.

I’m excited, I really am.

I’m just more aware than ever of all my weaknesses and inabilities. Numerous sources have told me that serving a mission will be the hardest, yet most rewarding, thing I will ever do. It will be a “great polar star” that I will look to for the rest of my life- maybe even throughout all the eternities.

Some returned missionaries focus on the struggles, some focus on the blessings. I just need to go in there ready to work and not let my nerves get the best of me. I’m not going on a mission for the Lord, I’m going on a mission with the Lord; and with Him I can do all things.

This weekend I attended the 178th General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
I like to go to conference with questions or problems to see if I can get a little insight from our beloved leaders, and by golly by the end of the first session all my questions had been answered, my problems were addressed, and my fears were calmed. And I’m sure many of you had similar experiences. Even if answers weren’t directly given from the pulpit, the Spirit whispered things to my soul that my Heavenly Father desired me to know.

Among the many answers I received was a feeling of comfort. I desired to know how to prepare to serve a mission; how to be ready to serve the people of Chile to the best of my ability. I was worried that I didn’t have enough to give.

“You don’t know everything, but you know enough.” – Elder Neil L. Anderson
His whole talk was awesome. I needed every word of it.

“Put everything into preparing”- Elaine S. Dalton

President Monson’s address taught me that if I put my all into preparing I will be allowed to teach with the Spirit, I will be given the energy, direction, and the words that I will need while serving a mission. The Lord takes care of his missionaries, but I have to do my part. As worthless as my efforts may be, if I do what I can, He will provide what I lack.

Conference was great, and I am ready to keep pushing forward.

Daisy's and the color yellow

October just started, and things are well in order for me to become a full-time missionary. My dad and I bought a bunch of luggage last night. One of them is like a closet on wheels; Lanny said that would come in handy (since I’ll be living in places often referred to as a “dump”).

I’m becoming best friends with all the people I work with, too. I’m trying to get to know the people better so I can practice sharing the gospel with them. It’s working so far! I see one guy in the gym all the time and he comes over by my office every now and then. Laura came in really excited today and said he was asking about me- she stressed that he was single and good-looking ;) Although that is totally not my focus right now (disregarding the fact that he’s in his mid 30’s), I think that gives me a good “in”. Flirt to convert, right? Hah! Just kidding!! (…well, as a missionary I’m kidding, as Brittany Mayhugh, I am not.)

Everything is going beautifully and preparation for the mission couldn’t be better! I have everything I could ever need at my fingertips and a loving family to support me in all I do. The church is so very true and I’m excited to devote all my time and energy into proclaiming that simple, essential notion.

The Call

Friday July 11, 2008 I received my mission call.

I was chillin' in the library with my friend Dan when I got a phone call. It was Natalie. Natalie never calls during the day. If she needs to tell me something she'll text.
I knew it was here.
I answered the phone and she confirmed my thoughts. Lindsey and Janiece were in the background laughing... I loved it.
I immediately hugged Dan and ran into the stairwell to call my family.

The rest of the day went by super fast. I barely had enough time to finish all my stuff before I opened my call at the set time (5:30). Everyone came.
The Camden Six living room was full of the coolest people on the planet (my friends).
I got everyone on the phone: Parents, Siblings, Grandparents, Friends in Kansas, Friend in Florida.... everyone was waiting.

I picked up the envelope and tore it open. My entire body immediately started shaking; I couldn't hold myself still. (I heard people around me talking about it, but I couldn't look up to see who it was, all my focus was on the packet of paper in my hands).
I managed to cover up the letter with the packet they gave so I could see only one line at a time. I managed to read the first line (my hands shaking all over the place), then I moved the packet down revealing the next. My eyes went straight to the call:

Chile Santiago North Mission

I screamed. My legs crumbled as I fell to the floor. I looked up and saw Megan Allen. I yelled where I was going but only she understood. She screamed. We grabbed each other and I almost came to tears. (I didn't, though, which really surprised me). We released each other and Megan sat down. I didn't know what to do so I jumped on her again, curling up in her lap. I shot back up and stood there for a second. Everyone was staring at me. Zach said, "where are you going!?"
I answered. Everyone was excited.
I came back to where the phones were and tried, as calmly as I could, to tell them all where I was going. It took forever for my mom to hear. I think she was just in shock, though, so she didn't want to hear it (she was really hoping for Temple Square). Everyone eventually heard and they're all excited. I'm going to take a Spanish class before I head out (since I haven't had any instruction concerning that, or any other foreign language).

I'm so excited to serve. It's going to be a long 3 1/2 months till I report to the MTC (I go in November 5th), but its ok, I need all the time I can get to prepare.

I can already feel the difference of having my call. I taught yesterday in Relief Society and I was more able to speak from my heart, my tongue is loosening up. And while that is the case, I am also feeling more pressure from a lot of things. My friend Michelle said, "now that you have you're call you have that added protection, but Satan is also working harder on you."

I feel the power of both sides already and I know I need to be on my guard more than ever. I can't just slack off and go into the MTC unprepared. If Satan can do nothing except keep me exactly where I am, then he has succeeded. If he can just stop me from progressing than he has won. I can't let that happen. I won't.